Two Days!

I leave for the Philippines in two days! I'm super excited and am 85% done with my packing. I can't wait to see my cousins and relax for almost a whole month!

I spent most of Saturday with Jeremy and some of his family. We went to communiversity and got some greek food from one of the vendors. The event itself was slightly disappointing and I'm pretty sure Rutgers Day would've been the better of the two, but at least I got to see Jeremy's Grammy, Aunt, Uncle and cousin. After our lunch Jeremy and I split up with the group to get away from the crowded Nassau Street scene and ended up sitting by the fountain by the library. It was a gorgeous day and I had a lot of fun people-watching and chatting with Jeremy :)

Later drove back to New Bruns with Cindy and Jeremy to meet Leighann at Jeremy's apt. The rest of the afternoon was filled with Wii games,a nice walk in the park, DELICIOUS indian food at a Vegetarian restaurant in Edison, board games, and the dilema of how to get me back home. Overall I had a lot of fun and I love Jeremy's family. I also love Jeremy and am so in love with him...

I'm going to miss a handful of people while I'm in the Philippines, but I guess I don't really see anyone when I'm home in NJ so it probably won't be much different. I will miss my best friends though...then again, I ALWAYS miss them...

Two more days and I'll be able to be sitting in a lounge chair on a white-sand beach, bright sun in the sky, palm trees around, nice breeze, tropical/refreshing drink, maybe some fresh mango, a good book or my ipod and great company!!
I.CAN'T. WAIT :)

hockey what?

So I have stopped watching NHL hockey. I stopped watching it for quite some time now. I think the last time I watched a full game was the year it started up again after the year-long hiatus. I think it was Sean that mentioned it was a crazy sport because people weren't penalized what they should be after nearly killing other players on the ice. Hockey has always been a violent sport, it's a physical game and I've always appreciated the aggressiveness and passion the players have when they're on the ice, especially during playoff season. Then I saw a friend's status on facebook in regards to some goal being scored with 2.0 seconds and figured it wasn't about the Devils. It turns out that it is.

http://www.nhl.tv/team/console.jsp?catid=382&id=40456

The series is now tied 2 - 2. I can't say that my favorite team is the New Jersey Devils anymore, yet I can't say I don't like them. If anything, I've stopped caring all together. I still enjoying watching the occasional highlights, more specifically during playoffs when the excitement and the win are 10x more important. Sadly, I didn't feel like a proud fan when in the last few seconds of that clip, Brodeur (once my favorite hockey player, whose posters I still have all over my bedroom) throws his stick straight into the wall in frustration. It reminded me of an incident when JoAnne and I used to go to Pirate games and a certain someone did something similar. Not proud at all...

*Sigh* I don't know what the point of this entry was, or if there was one at all. I just saw this clip and realized that I probably stopped watching hockey when Sean pointed out how the league tolerates behavior like this that shouldn't make the fans proud, shouldn't make the players proud, but should instead by discouraged but isn't.

The Best Things in Life are Free

I've been working on self-improvements. Basically trying to stay positive - on life, on day to day problems that may arise, on myself. I've been taking time each day to write in a journal and think of at least one thing I like about myself, call it self-therapy if you will. I have been doing this for about a month and am happy to say that it was useful last night. I've been able to keep myself busy with tutoring, babysitting, family parties/get-togethers, summer job and grad school apps, running, painting, crafting, reading, seeing Jeremy, seeing friends, just about anything and everything. It's been going well so far. I was feeling great, starting to boost up my self-esteem, feel like I'm working towards a goal and then yesterday happened, well more like last night.

It was the same old stuff - stressed out, missing Jeremy, missing the best friends, comparing myself to others, wanting to get engaged, no call backs for summer jobs, trouble with personal statements for grad programs, confusion. When I get stressed out I tend to just sit and overthink EVERYTHING. So last night after I made Jeremy stay up at least a couple hours more than he had intended to, I read that journal of things I like about myself. It really helped a lot. I know I could have everyone tell me things I'm good at and why I'm a great person, but it's always nice to see that I had taken time to appreciate myself.

So I woke up this morning thinking, hey being jobless isn't the worst thing in the world right now, right? I have a house to live in, I'm not starving, I don't have a serious illness, I have a great group of best friends who love me as well as a huge bundle of friends from HS and RU that also love me, I have parents that love me and want to see me happy, I have an amazing boyfriend who loves me more than anything in the world, I have a good heart and am always wanting to and willing to help others, I graduated from a good university in 4 years, I am good at working with children (I think), I have the ability to love other people and love them well.

So while I may be unemployed and busy searching for jobs and the answers to the never-ending question "what am I doing with my life?", i just keep reminding myself that it could be worse. I may not be rich with money, but I'm pretty damn rich with other wonderful things life has to offer. Hmm..now if only kindness and a warm smile could get me some new flip flops & sunglasses for my trip to the Philippines...

Weekend Updates

I did some more Temp work at Tracy's company, which was fun and enjoyable, as usual. I really love the people she works with, they're all such fun and genuinely nice people. Then had dinner at Grimaldi's with Tracy and Lucy, which was AWESOME because I've realized I LOVE Grimaldi's and I also hadn't seen Lucy in months! Dinner was delicious and filled with laughter and great conversation. I love leaving a dinner and feeling full and happy.

Spent the weekend in south Jersey with the cousins and other family in honor of Alyssa's 18th Birthday. I can't believe she's already 18, graduating high school in a couple months AND is starting Rutgers in the fall.

Easter was nice. Went to church with the family and realized that little kids have the cutest outfits for Easter - complete with their white straw hats and gloves and pastel colors and little ties - all soo cute and did not help to move me away from my recent phase of wanting children like NOW. Then spent the day with the cousins and had Easter dinner.

Back to the subject of having children, I would like to get married first. I found out that someone I had been classmates with, but not really friends with, just got engaged. Her boyfriend took her on a vacation to a tropical place and proposed to her there. They had only been going out for almost 4 years. Jeremy and I will have been dating 5 years this October. I want to get engaged.

Is is sad that instead of focusing all my energy on careers and career goals I'm off daydreaming about the perfect proposal, a beautiful wedding, having children, and raising a family?

Lastly, leaving for the Philippines this month and I am sooooo excited. 17 DAYS!!!

21 DAYS

So when I thought things were finally going my way, the same old dumb problems reappear and I find myself REALLY looking forward to getting away from these problems and people and EVERYTHING for almost an entire month. Granted, these headache-inducers will most likely still be here when I get back, but at least I will be able to enjoy fun in the sun, relaxing on beautiful beaches, doing some cheap shopping sprees and seeing relatives I haven't seen in years. I can't wait to leave.

Romance is dead

or maybe on hiatus?

I don't know why but lately I've been craving a storybook ending/best scene in a movie/fireworks provoking/time of your life/swept off your feet moment. Not to say that Jeremy and I aren't doing well, we're doing great and still very much in love. However, I feel like I want more and maybe I'm being too selfish. Maybe it's because I've been watching a love of chick flick love stories or reading books based on love or swooning over tv characters that surprise the girl they want to be with at the perfect moment. Whatever the cause may be of my sudden need for romance, the bottom line is that I want to be swept off my feet. I want to have fun romantic stories to tell people so for once I can be on the other side of my usual convo about significant others. Maybe I just want to feel special. What many of these movies, books and shows have in common is the fact that the guy is willing to do anything and everything he can to show his love interest that he wants to be with her and make her happy and will even go so far as to sacrifice his own likes so that even just for a moment she will be the happiest. Do moments like these actually happen in real life anymore? If only...

It's just a little crush...

I've been watching Dancing with the Stars with my mom for the past few weeks and due to this recent bonding experience, I've sadly had to miss out on new GG (Gossip Girl) episodes. So the past two days I have been catching up on the two weeks I've missed so Nancy and I can gossip about Gossip Girl. Besides being surprised, shocked and mesmerized by the show about NYC HS elite, I've also realized I have a major crush on Chace Crawford, the actor who plays Nate Archibald. Maybe it's the recent episode (SPOILER) where his character, Nate, surprises B by showing up at the park to surprise her at one of her fave spots so their first kiss can be special - cue picture perfect moment, light background music and slowly falling snow, as they both lean in slowly for what seems to be the most romantic kiss EVER. *sigh* I'm probably just crushing on him because of this one moment of the N and B rekindled romance. It's either that or his gorgeous blue eyes.

That's probably it. Besides, everyone who knows me knows that I am a sucker for blue or green eyes.

This entry was slightly pointless, but nothing is really new since I last updated and GG has been on my mind for the past two days. Another pointless but entertaining thing to check out is fmylife.com. It's always good for some laughs/mood boosters/self-esteem boosters/and "glad it didn't happen to me" moments, like this:

Today, my boyfriend brought me breakfast in bed, told me all the things he loved about me, got down on one knee and pulled out the little blue box I had been hoping for, for so long. He opened the box and there was a note inside that said, "April Fools!" FML

If Jeremy did that, I would probably cry.