I am...

confused. But I am counting down the days until the next FFFCUP reunion. I wish everything could be like my friendship with my three best friends - it's always guaranteed, it's drama free, it's easy to maintain and it's always fun. If everything in my life were as wonderful as my best friends, sadness would NOT be part of my vocabulary.

Update & Tough Love

I got back a couple weeks ago from my month in the Philippines. It was probably one of the best vacations I have had - ever. It was great to see family that I hadn't seen in over 10 years, and to catch up with the cousins. It was also great to have a month of nothing but fun and get away from all of my worries.

Unfortunately, along with my tan and 900+ photos, I brought back the same worries from pre-Philippines. It's the same old stuff - what am I doing with my life? how will I ever become successful? why do I feel like nothing? etc... I guess you can get rid of your problems for a short amount of time, but sooner or later they come back again. So it's back to the same boring routine of figuring out my future.

In addition to being stressed about all of my life's uncertainties, I've also realized that a lot of my "friends" don't understand the word "friendship". I've decided that friendship is NOT a one-way street and if others are not willing to meet me halfway, then they shouldn't bother even showing up. Honestly, when you're at some of the loneliest times of your life you really do realize who your REAL friends are.

Another great roadtrip to visit Pascale in Montreal this past weekend has left me with severe FFFCUP withdrawal. *sigh* I love those girls.

More updates later when I'm not feeling sad, lonely, and useless.